I honestly thought I’d seen it all until I woke this morning to an email from a company called Percolate who have published a “White Paper”.
“Ooh, a White Paper – must be important and true because David Cameron has signed it off, what incredible words of wisdom does it hold within its shimmering virginal covers?”
“As the pressure to demonstrate the value of marketing grows, one overlooked metric for return on investment (ROI) analysis is on the rise. Non working spend [my emboldening] is the cost of producing marketing content, as opposed to media spend distributing it.”
Here it is in more detail. In case you think I made a dreadfully stupid assumption.
Yes, it really does say “Non working [spend) is EVERYTHING ELSE [my caps].”
So, my thirty year career, not to mention that of my planning friends, my creative buddies, my TV producers, digital content creators, print buyers, secretaries (back in the day), studio managers and those scary guys that work for them but deliver such great work…they’re all “non working spend.”
A necessary evil.
Expensive grist to the media mill owners.
Jeezo. I’m gonna have to take a little minute here.
I’m a little shaken, I admit.
I mean it’s a fucking White Paper. Not just any old made up shit.
Sorry I let you down. Remember I told you I worked in a reputable industry where I made a difference – along with Charlie, and Smudger and Jimbo and Will?
Yeah. That’s them.
And Gerry too and Raymond, and Roger.
Yeah, yes Victoria and Ruth.
All just “Non Working Spend.”
That guy at the government. Remember I told you about him?
The guy you liked off the telly?
No, not George Osborne, he’s a bad man.
The Scottish guy.
Remember I came home and told you he said advertising people were like “leeches’?
Yup, that’s him.
Well, he was right, ‘cos it’s in a White Paper.
We’re all just “Non Working Spend.”
You don’t believe me?
Read it here.